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New social challenges students experience after entering the University

Even students who did not have significant problems with social relationships in the past often experience new conflicts or problems of adaptation after arriving at the University. This is because new aspects of interpersonal relationships are encountered at each developmental stage of life.

A wider range of interpersonal relations

During middle school or high school, students are mostly focused on their college entrance exams and the range of their social relationships is mostly limited to the classroom. By contrast, the upon arriving at the University, students engage with a far wider range of relationships with people they meet in various settings, including the department, social clubs, study groups, college-level organizations, and the dormitory. Therefore, unlike in previous situations where friends were easily found within the classroom, college students must take more active initiative to build friendships.

Changes in the quality of relationships

In contrast to secondary school, where the fact of being in the same class created a strong sense of solidarity, the University presents a wider range for relationships and therefore students factor in various criteria such as personality, values, hobbies, and career interests when forming friendships. Because of the greater variety of criteria and the wider availability of potential acquaintances, interpersonal relationships are both more frequently formed and also frequently dissolved.

More opportunities for romantic relationships

Since the University community is much more liberal and tolerant of romantic relationships, students frequently engage with potential romantic partners. These romantic relationships have more depth and intensity compared to similar encounters during adolescence, and can lead to love. Love involves the exchange of intense passions, giving rise to a wide spectrum of emotions from ecstatic happiness to sadness and even pain.

The challenges of military service for males students 

Upon entering the military, students are exposed to very unique social relations that are sharply distinguished from other experiences. The strict hierarchical relations that demand obedience to a superior and the severe restriction on personal freedoms forms the context in which the soldier shares daily life with peers from a variety of regions and educational backgrounds.

The Traits of People Who Have Mature Interpersonal Relationships..

Realistic desires and expectations regarding others 

People who have mature relationships have the capability of realistically adjusting their expectations about others in the context of the given environment. The ability to adjust expectations comes from a deep insight and understanding regarding your own inner desires. A mature person diligently monitors his or her own inner desires and expectations and takes caution not to set up rigid and unrealistic expectations toward others.

Sincere and considerate approach to relationships 

To form a successful interpersonal relationship, neither your own desires nor the other’s desires should be unilaterally sacrificed. The relationship must be built on mutual respect. To achieve this, you should be understanding of the other’s feelings and be as candid as possible in communicating your feelings clearly. A mature person has consideration for others and the skills required for efficiently negotiating and reaching compromises

An objective judgment of others’ intentions 

In reality, it is nearly impossible to maintain a completely objective perspective. Our perceptions and judgments are ultimately always subjective. Nonetheless, for a mature relationship, it is important to try your best to observe others’ intentions and feelings as carefully as possible. Avoid hasty judgments and minimize the chance of distorting your perceptions. The majority of our misunderstandings regarding others arise from the frustration of our own projected desires and expectations.

Maintaining a calm emotional state

Responding in an unnecessarily emotional way can impede your ability to build a mature relationship. People who are able to maintain relationships in a realistic and flexible manner do express their emotions when they find others’ actions inappropriate, but do not allow excessive emotion to exacerbate conflict.

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